Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Today all of us spent our morning doing chores, eating munchkins from Dunkin Donuts, watching our ritual weekend morning travel channel and generally spending time together. Nothing special, nothing grand, nothing out-of-the-ordinary. Somewhere along the morning, I paused to revel in my happiness. My overwhelming happiness of calm, relaxing, things-will-get-done-when-we-get-to-them attitude. Somehow this joy catches me off guard. How is it that a mundane Saturday morning can awaken these feelings in me? Why am I so surprised "just being" with my family is enough to spark such feelings?
I don't deserve the love and joy that the three of you bring to my life... but I will happily lap up every morsel offered. In times of great stress and great annoyance (which there have been many moments over the last couple of weeks) I need to remember how blessed I am.
How blessed all of us are.
A special thank you to aunt Katie who took our first family pictures at the Udvar-Hazy Air and Space museum last weekend!
Thursday, July 21, 2011
I kid. I kid. Your father and I are both second born children... the parents are always more relaxed with the second. And more tired too.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Friday, July 15, 2011
On July 4, 2011 you became a big sister. I went into labor in the early morning and by 11:06am your little sister entered the world. Lucille Clare was healthy and was born screaming, just like you. In fact, Lucy is alot like you as a newborn, except she has a ton more hair. A ridiculous amount of thick black hair.
I don't what what will happen to this blog. I don't want to start another one for Lucy, but I don't want to change this one either. For now, I am keeping this entry all about you. I will dedicate an entire entry to the "spectacular" entrance of your little sister. She was born on the 4th of July afterall and we celebrated with fireworks that night :)
On the night of July 4 you came to the hospital to meet Lucille. You were excited and very in the moment for about 5 minutes. Then you became bored with the whole baby thing and you wanted to go eat dinner with Daddy in the hospital cafeteria. You ate an entire salad so it wasn't a wasted trip. You spent the week with Nonni and Nonna at "Nonni Camp" which you keep asking to return to. You came home on Friday and all was smooth... for about 5 minutes. Last weekend was dicey at best. Last Saturday night I found you on the floor of your room at 9:30pm just crying your eyes out. When I asked you what was wrong, you just kept telling me you were sad over and over again. I laid down with you for awhile until Lucy insisted on being fed. Daddy took over and we got you back to sleep, only to have you wake up at 1:30am crying again. By 2:30am you and Lucy were both in bed with Daddy and I. No one had much sleep that night. It broke my heart to see you so sad.
You don't appear to be sad or upset at Lucy, in fact you love to play with her, help change her diaper, take her on walks, and generally interact with her. I think you are sad that things in our house have changed dramatically. You have completely stopped using the potty and you look to control anything we allow. At meals you now need no less than 4 pieces of cutlery for yourself, mostly a variety of spoons. You have frequent meltdowns about little things like eating your Slurpee outside. The tiniest correction or negative comment such as the word "no" will throw you into a tizzy sometimes an all-out-heap-on-the-floor-crying-hysterically fit. By Tuesday night, I had had it. Daddy came home from work and found you in the yard with no pants (because you refused to put any on) eating a day-old Slurpee with sticky green syrup everywhere. I have stopped arguing with you and I allow you to control situations and things that aren't that important like cutlery and wearing pants. The fits and meltdowns have lessened as the week wore on. They aren't gone but they are better. You are so eager to help and be a part of the action. I taught you how to use the microwave when cooking. This was a bad parenting move since tonight you put a bowl of vegetables with a metal spoon in the microwave. Thank goodness it was only for 30 seconds.
Today was my first solo day with you and your sister. We went (walked) to the park. I was so exhausted and on edge by the time we returned an hour and half later I thought I was going to need one of my Percocets. I refrained from the narcotics and somehow got your fussy sister fed and put down and you fed and put down (I might have bribed you with a lollipop though). By 2pm it was all quiet and I was shaking with exhaustion. I have no idea how I am going to handle the two of you on a regular basis. Just getting out the door is a nerve-racking experience; a lesson in patience, negotiations and resilience. I'm praying it gets easier each time we venture out. Of course you have an uncanny ability to know when I'm at my tipping point because just as I was about to loose it, you climb onto my lap wrap your arms around me and say, "I love you Mommy!"
Lucy has been here for only 11 days and home for 7... but it feels like so much longer. It hasn't been a smooth road this past week but we have survived. We are a family and for that simple fact, I am so humbled and grateful. No amount of sleepless nights or screaming fits or meltdowns by you or Lucy can change our bliss.
We love you and Lucy so much it can't be put into words.